I Chose to Burn Out

10 years ago my typical schedule looked something like this:

• 4:11am - Wake up worried I'm behind, and check email from bed. My choice.
• 5am - Skip workout for the third time this week and prep for today's meetings. My choice.
• 6:55am - Help my kids get ready while worrying about the projects I was leading. My choice.
• 7:15am - Drive to the office while checking email on my phone (yes, I got three traffic violations for it). My choice.
• 8am - Lead a meeting where I commit to things I have no idea if I have time to complete. My choice.
• 9:15am - Desk time to work on my priorities, getting nothing actually done since I have my email and Slack open, distracting me the entire time. My choice.
• 10:37am - "Urgent" need from my team that they could easily solve by themselves, but I own it and fix it for them. My choice.
• 11:57pm - Last minute request from my boss. I'm frustrated with him. Working from my desk for lunch (again). I Uber Eats McDonalds and supersize it because I'm stressed. My choice.
• 1:30pm - Lead another meeting with no agenda. Most of time spent on rabbit trails. Meeting runs 17 minutes long. My choice.
• 2:47pm - Back to back meetings means I'm late to the second meeting. I can tell everyone is frustrated. My choice.
• 3:30pm - Finally time to get some priority work done, but have 127 unread emails. Waste 12 minutes doom scrolling social media, then just do email instead of the items I had prioritized. My choice.
• 4:32pm - Team member asks if I have "5 minutes" to chat. I sigh, tearing myself away from my email. We talk till 6:11pm with no clear next steps. My choice.
• 6:11pm - Leave late from work. See three missed calls from my wife. I know she's mad. Text her to let her know I'm on my way. My choice.
• 7:05pm - Dinner with family, including cranky toddlers. Bath time with the kids while I think about the work I "have" to do once they're asleep. My choice.
• 8:00pm - Quick check-in with my wife to hear about her day. My mind is still thinking about the work I "have" to do, so I'm not very present. My choice.
• 8:37pm - Open laptop back up and "finally" can get work done since it's quiet. Team member messages me for help on an item, because I've set the example that we work late. I stop to help them. Takes an hour. My choice.
• 9:37pm - Wife is going to bed, asking if I'm staying up late "again". I non-emotionally say "yes" with no eye contact, frustrated she is even asking me. I'm doing my best to provide for our family. My choice.
• 11:15pm - Hungry since I haven't eaten in 5 hours. Healthy food sounds lame, so I fill a bowl of ice cream, then doomscroll again for 22 minutes, if only to not feel stressed for a moment. My choice. 
• 1:04am - I send of my last email, scheduling it to send at 8am so no one knows I'm working this late. 4 things undone, but I can barely keep my eyes open. My choice.
• 1:11am - I lay in bed exhausted, my brain buzzing. I know this is not sustainable, and tell myself I just need to get past this project. My choice.
• 4:23am - I wake up worried...

Before I created the Time Boss Weekly Framework, I lived the day above on repeat for nearly a decade.

It ended in burn out. 

And it was all my choice.

But Andrew, this level of stress is just the way it is if you want to be successful...

No, stress is just a form of motivational fuel, and it has diminishing returns. Endure high levels of stress too long, and your body will declare bankruptcy on you and burnout. This is your body telling you the way you're operating is not sustainable, and something must change.

You'll never fully eliminate stress. The key is regulate the right kind of stress, the kind that helps you lock in and do your best work, and find your Highest Sustainable Pace.

But Andrew you were just trying to provide for your family...

I was, but I was wrong to assume that my way of operating was the only way to provide. I just needed to be shown there was another way. 

But Andrew, your clients and your boss were demanding things from you. How could you say no?

They were "asking" me for things, and I was wrong to think that "no" was not an acceptable option. Time is cash, not credit, and my constant "yes" was committing time I didn't have. This was bad for me, causing me to work well beyond my capacity, and was bad for them, because they were going to get either (a) poor or rushed results from my overloaded brain, or (b) I simply wouldn't be able to follow-through for lack of time.

But Andrew, you were just trying to help other people...

No, I was addicted to "feeling" valuable. A full email inbox made me feel valuable. Solving problems myself made me feel valuable. Last minute requests made me feel valuable. And in my heart of hearts, I didn't want to change because I was afraid I would lose my value.

I was more committed to feeling valuable, than I was to the actual results I wanted from my vocation, and the life I wanted for my family. I needed to be honest about that, and choose to commit to the results I actually wanted. 

Burnout Was My Choice, and It Was My Choice to Change

My relationship with time changed when I accepted 100% responsibility for the results I was getting, and my experience of life. And the same can happen for you.

Every week has 168 hours, however it's actually 168 choices. The results you're getting, and your experience of life, are 100% a function of those choices.

If you want to change your life, you have to change your choices with your 168 hours.

And I want to show you how to do it. 

How to Get the Results You Want Without Overwhelm

The Time Boss Weekly Framework was built through blood, sweat and (LOTS of) tears, because I was determined to get the results I wanted without overwhelm. After the final time I burnt out, I promised myself I'd never let that happen again. It took me 10 long years to solve this problem, combining the wisdom of every time management book available, countless coffee sessions with mentors, and 100's of weekly experiments, making adjustment after adjustment to get the results I wanted without overwhelm. My goal was to create a simple repeatable system I would actually use, and I did it. I get the results I want, without overwhelm, week in and week out, both vocationally with Time Boss, and with my family. 

What took me 10 years, you can learn in 90 minutes via the Time Boss Masterclass. But here's the deal: life change is hard. It's one thing to learn a framework, it's another thing to change your habits related to time.

Find a friend or do it with a teammate, just don't do it alone. And if you want to get quicker results, reach out to Time Boss for help. Whether it's our Digital Course, Group Coaching or 1x1 Coaching, we can help you rapidly upgrade your habits related to time, and work through the inevitable friction that keeps us from making significant change.

Your life is a choice. You are either going to choose to get the life you actually want, or you are going to choose a life you can tolerate.

My invitation to you is to choose the life you actually want.